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But not impossible: Martin Short's hilarious and bizarrely fey Jiminy Glick character has been mangling celebrity interviews on Comedy Central's Primetime Glick and now finally makes the leap to the big screen in the brilliant new movie Jiminy Glick in Lalawood.
The 31-year-old Derry man - who's believed to have lost several fingers - was rushed to Altnagelvin hospital in agony after mangling his hand in a meat mincer on Friday.
And as scientists develop sensors for other fruits, the days of mango mangling and peach-pinching may soon be over.