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Situations Vacant - Edinburghbased numismatist required urgently for coin-collecting operation.
If anyone has looked at the situations vacant sections in The Guardian newspaper over the years, they will see what I mean: discipline resources director, movement of people co-ordinator and programme manager for national supporting people value improvement programme.
Inside, a long list of Situations Vacant hints at the number of Tyneside men called up to fight in the First World War.
Westminster sources suggest mum-of-four Cherie has already got her eye on a seat in her native Merseyside, but there are currently no situations vacant.
Reading through the situations vacant section, an advert for photocopier salesmen working for a company in Stockton caught his eye.
I've never seen a situations vacant ad declaring: "Wanted - Irish dancer, must be able to raise both legs very quickly.
Jurors had heard how the brothel advertised for workers in the Situations Vacant column of the Daily Sport newspaper.
Occasionally, however, even lawyers can do a double-take as they read through the situations vacant.
But if it was just a mutual moment of madness, I'd say nothing but start looking at the situations vacant pages.
However, reading any situations vacant columns, there are very few comparable salaries in the private sector for similar responsibilities.
If there were to be an honest situations vacant ad for the British armed services, how could it fail to read like that?